He walks with her through crowds, underneath the city, close to her. He rests his arm on her shoulders. His eyes are lit up. The hole inside him feels further away. And he just can't get close enough, close to a place, a feeling, a desire that shakes and writhes within him. He wants to be where others have been, feel what others have felt. He wants to be beside her, proud and arrogant. And he realizes "I am not ashamed anymore", wishing he would accidently run into old high school chums. He would smile. And so would they.

He thinks about his life and calculates his experiences. He understands that he can finally compete with others. A flash in the pan, for sure... but he's ultimately made it. It may never happen again. He must enjoy these moments now. And he hopes that everybody is paying attention, because who knows when it will all disappear.

And he knows he'll be inside her soon. He thinks of that, and he thinks of other things too, like computers and mp3s. And he waits for that day to come. And he realizes she's the only one he'd ever wait for.